#it's funny that they think I'm going to waste my time on them

[narfin-frood]

Silly question but how do you art?

Or more like, how is your process to draw? Your lines and posing are so loose and show the feeling of a character so well, like, how do you make your art so real with only a few lines is what most amaze me. Anyway I hope I'm not bothering you and that makes sense, thanks for reading!<3

you're not a bother, don't worry! i'm not sure if there's an appropriately concise answer to a question like this, but i'll try to explain my process for poses a bit, and if there's anything else specific you'd like to know about my process, feel free to ask, and i'll try to answer!

for posing, i find it's very helpful to start by thinking about what situation the character is in. you don't need a location or a background or anything (unless you're being #serious about it). for this, i chose "picking up something way too heavy" (cont. under cut, wall of text ahead)

keeping it very simple is key!!! do not worry about details!!! i am very bad at this. i love to add a little detail or two, like his eyes or his little expression, but i have to catch myself before i get too into it, otherwise i'll forget the point of what i was doing and/or get bored. use just enough strokes to get the point across, and stop there (for now).

i draw fast and loose, with long strokes, which also happens to help with the problem that happens if you start with any specific part of the body. it's important to start with... everything at once, or else you won't be able to see what needs to be changed or fixed until it's too late and you've already decided on where you want the head and the left arm to be!

to display effort & strain without just contorting the character's face, you gotta think about just how heavy the object is, how one would go about grabbing it comfortably, and whether your character is smart enough to lift with their legs.

wander is great (read: BEST CHARACTER DESIGN EVAR. i love him kisskisskiss) because he's not grounded in any sort of reality until necessary, and his limbs have no bones, but he still has specific proportions and volumes to refer back to if you get carried away with the wackiness. posing a character made up of several noodles of varying widths is very simple, because you can do basically whatever you want to push and pull and make it as clear (and/or as funny) as possible.

start with your line of action, in this case the long line connecting his neck and his left foot. think about where the floor is, so you can make the feet of your character and whatever else is touching it coexist in the same reality. think about clarity: big, simple shapes are your friends, and if you're not getting the gist of the pose through the silhouette alone, try again! there's NO shame in hiding the first layer and doing a couple more sketches until you land on something you really like. Don't polish a turd, especially if you yourself think it's a turd. it'll make you feel like you're wasting time, and drawing is about having fun and experimenting, so if it's getting boring or frustrating, it's time to try something else.

wander and other characters with no bones and no rules are great for posing because you can do things like make their arms bend the wrong way just to play with the clarity of the pose. this:

un-breaks the arms and makes a little more sense for somebody with elbows, but some clarity in the action is lost when the arms don't curve upward and away from the very heavy object he's straining to pick up.

grounding your characters is both more complex and easier than it sounds, and it unfortunately requires you to think about perspective (i know. i know. i know it sucks and it's confusing. i hated it for a very long time but once it clicks, you'll have it in your brain forever)

fudging a perspective grid is fairly easy, just draw several parallel lines and have them get closer to each other as they recede into the distance, and then do it again in the opposite direction. you can use the transform tool in whatever program you use most to fudge this for even less effort, by just getting a png of a grid and fucking with it

now that you've got your floor, think about those feet. the grid makes it fairly easy to envision how a shoe would look sitting on that floor:

this is also where having an understanding of volumes comes in handy, because things farther in the distance will in fact look smaller, but it's up to you to figure out just how much smaller it would be in comparison to the other identical thing with the same volume that's closer to the camera. usually it's almost negligible, but it becomes easy to spot if it's a little off.

and here's the pose i settled on! i made his noodle arms more extreme for extra XD factor and i put him on his tippy toes for that extra bit of height!

a lot of the principles i'm talking about in this post i mainly pick up from consciously watching my favorite cartoons (and live action shows) and if i really, really like the way something is done, or if i see something that i've never really registered before, i'll screencap it or i'll pause or i'll just keep thinking about it until i draw again.

this is called "building a visual library" and it's the #1 easiest and most important way to practice. it requires no drawing, unless you want it to. look at lots of art by artists you love, and if you see something and you think to yourself, hey, this looks really good, by all means, absorb it.

art is great and it's really fun and there's literally nothing wrong with taking inspiration where you can find it!! seriously!!! absorb your favorite parts of every art style you find cool and fun and put it into your own! you're the only person who can draw the way you draw, and while replicating an art style is fairly easy (or it can be, depending), matching it perfectly is Literally impossible, so don't worry about being derivative. Nobody will notice, and if they do, it's okay to say you're inspired by them! encouraged, even!

my own art style, like everybody else's, is a frankenstein's monster containing all of the things i've loved before!!! and i think thats beautiful and if anybody tries to tell you you've gotta be 100% original and have "your very own style", they're a filthy liar and they're definitely (consciously or not) already taking inspiration and reference from the things they themselves find cool and awesome.

ANYWAY. wall of text over.

TLDR: draw quickly, use long strokes (try not to pet your lines), have a specific situation to put your character in, get familiar with volumes and proportions, and have fun!!!

[heartshapedcreaturefromcriptoon]

@anonymous-archive Oh yeah? And who in the absolute fuck are you? Some kind of crop cop? I have a name, jsyk... Adults would be able to figure out my intentions through a thing called "reading comprehension" which is a thing they'd quickly figure out how to have if they looked at what I was really saying for more than a few seconds but what exactly the fuck are you trying do here, nonny? Like what exactly are you're intentions? Like, the fuck are you archiving? Oh wait! I already fucking know!

Because judging from these two different antis/fantis in your related blog, section, it might've lead me to this entirely correct notion that you might an anti/fanti yourself and that your suspicious fuck ass anon blog might have leaks on it and you might be trying to get me to inadvertently spread them... And low and I won't behold ... Your "archive" has leaks... And now I have to see if I can reblogs the fuck off for this post in an effort to further contain what I will not see because now one of my posts has a leaker on it and you've tainted this post for everyone going forward!

But I want to make this statement first because you know ... I thought about doing a funny and blocking you, but screen capping your above reply in one of my "confusing" crop shots just like the one you're concern trolling me about and naming you and shaming you and outting you as a leaker... But then I'd thought I'd be naming a leaker and a way to access leaks on my blog either way? Which is technically what I just did with venting about bnf bullshitter petitprincess1 willing leaking shit to people too, just like you are, which I guess is what lead to the rest of you leak geeks coming out of the woodwork to get me now huh? So I can't win!

Technically though, what I can do now is give people the actual link to your blog they'll need to click in order to both block and report you while I give myself ample opportunity to block and report you after I make this public statement about how much I hate you and that that what you are doing is objectively wrong, before I disable reblogs so your bullshit can't spread further, just so everyone will know I condemn you...And much like good reading comprehension skills imply, I think that my friends and followers in the fandom are smart enough to understand how I'm unironically condemning your shitty behavior here and will thus be smart enough to know not to look at any actual leaks as I am naming you and shaming you and link them back to your blog so we can all block and report you and hopefully get you deleted for doing that ...

All of this is to say ...

@anonymous-archive is apparently a Hazbin Leak Archive, everybody! Don't even look at their shitty stolen "content" just please use the drop down menu from the @ to block and report them like I'm about to! And anony, again, for the record you've just completely ruined my post with all your unnecessary commentary by being an unnecessary stinky leak spread sandwich and a completely unnecessary waste of space and time so fuck the right the hell off and choke for that too! :D ♥ X.O

Fyi I don't care how old you are, if you post any obnoxious banners in the main tags, you're no better than antis and should get the fuck out of the fandom.

There's a nuanced argument to be made about how Striker and Blitz would 100% be in the right about Stolas if this was real life, but you're watching a raunchy adult cartoon musical fantasy where all the characters are flamboyant hot macho dicks who sometimes break out into whimsical musical parodies of Disney.

If you wanna watch a mediocre lizard who's not as much eye candy be right about a cartoon monarchy, you can go watch Star vs. The Forces of Evil because it's already all been done before and the children have already been taught that lesson.

But adults don't need to be taught that lesson, and Helluva Boss is for adults, so why don't you shut up and let the adults watch the much more aesthetically pleasing and attractive evil demon lizard/owl/whatever the the fuck monster bimbo men kiss and be horrible hot mess trash to each other and then maybe make the fuck up so that the other one can have their Sinderella Story?

It's all a fantasy wrapped in aesthetically pleasing adult animation.

For Fun.

This isn't me implying children's cartoons are actually deeper than any adult content, this me telling you that you're annoying if you clog the tags with petty childish shit like this and need to leave the rest of the adults who actually know what we're watching in peace.

[kookiecrush]

[disposal-blueeee]

really really small guys

edgar belongs to jhonen vasquez

scriabin belongs to @zarla-s

png ver. for some reason

andddd the sketch. for some reason too

[tardis--dreams]

I actually realized i hate work. Won't be putting any effort into this anymore ♡

[nivq87]

related thoughts:

my butterfly chasing has me tinkering with my tumblr blog page, and it's a wip atm (the html needs a LOT of adjusting atm) and my about and tags pagers are pretty out of date. so, I'll try and work on that over the week I suppose

my complaining tag hasn't been used in a few years. at first I thought I was just trying harder to keep the negativity off my blog (which I also do) but then I was actually reading some of the posts and. oh gosh. those were some Big emotions I was dealing with. Glad to not be That guy anymore. Your 20's really just kinda suck, but since you're out of your teens it feels unfair because you should be Beyond such angst. but. nope. apparently it'll keep going a bit longer. Fascinating collection of posts over the years as a retrospective.

[unma]

So I've calmed down. After today's events I find myself even more vindicated in my hatred for my family, but that's neither here nor there. I'm not trying to vent so often on this blog (feels too oversharey), so instead I'll let y'all know that my birthday is in two weeks! Specifically the 24th. So that's cool.

[alastors-wife]

Why do so many "doms" just do shit like choke or degrade you without bothering to give any warning or ask first

[il-miele-che-scrive]

you know what people are saying when a girl gets cheated on? go for his brother.

a/n not tryna offend anyone, I just love a lil drama

Part 2 here

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username1 Miss Y/n Y/l/n getting cheated on? No one is safe fr

↳username2 Yeah cuz how's he casually cheating on a literal goddess??

username3 they were together for almost 2 years😭

username4 My therapist will hear about this

↳username1 And Arthur is paying the bill

username5 that's it I'm NEVER trusting a man

username6 Isn't that girl Y/n's friend too? Poor girl getting cheated on twice

↳username3 yes it is 😭 guess Arthur got it from his brother

username7 Except Charles didn't cheat 😭 he's a homie hopper but he got morals

username8 I don't worry about Y/n, she's gonna find a new bf, but she wasted almost 2 years on him

yourusername excuse my state i'm as high as your hopes

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username2 Miss girl about to enter her hoe phase

↳username3 As she should tbh

charlottesiine Lots of fun last night🤍

↳yourusername nothing will beat an ex wags night out

↳username2 best ex wags fr 😭

yoursister Next time I'm going too to keep an eye on you wtf

username4 Wait so Y/n and Charlotte are friends? When did this happen?

↳username5 Yeah cuz we've never seen them hang out back when ChaCha was a thing and suddenly the girls are partying together?

↳username6 I mean it could be just a "we both suffered a Leclerc so let's hang out" kinda thing

username5 WE BOTH SUFFERED A LECLERC 💀 no okay but that's valid

username7 Am I the only one noticing this post was liked by Charles?

↳username2 He knows his lil bro messed up lmao

username8 Okay guys so what are we betting on - did Charles like this post because of Y/n or because of Charlotte? Also, isn't he in a relationship?

↳username3 Charles has been single for a few months now, he's free to like whoever he wants lmao

↳username9 It's just a like it's not that deep

arthur_leclerc You were my cup of tea but I drink vanilla latte now

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username1 The AUDACITY some men have

username2 and she was her best friend 😭

username3 I really want to believe they broke up before he got with the best friend but I don't think it's true

↳username4 Y/n and Arthur literally attended Charles' race a few days before we got the pics of Arthur with the other girl

comments on this post have been limited

yourusername you don't mean nothing at all to me

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yoursister And I didn't even have to stop you from calling your ex

↳yourusername why would I even wanna call him anyways

yoursister Riiight, you were too busy getting to know some other interesting people:)

username1 What is Y/s/n talking about?

↳username2 Or rather WHO is she talking about?

username3 No Charlotte in the post but Charles is in the likes again 😶

↳username4 Have you seen what this one gossip page posted? Charles being in the likes isn't the thing I'd worry about here

username5 WHAT.

username3 Care to elaborate?

username4 Charles was also at the club with Y/n. It honestly looks like it was organized by a friend of his and he took Y/n there

username2 OH

username2 That's what Y/s/n is talking about

username5 Our girl Y/n is getting promoted from F2 to F1 and I love to see that

↳username6 LMAO it's so funny because it's true 😭

↳username2 Do we know who else was at this party?

username4 Allegedly the party was organized by Gasly, so obviously there was his gf Kika, but also some fellow drivers like Albon, Russell, Sainz, Ocon, Ricciardo and their gfs

username5 I was joking but now it looks like Y/n is actually becoming an F1 wag now lol

username7 Gossip girl on wheels I've been saying it for months

username8 But the caption SLAPS

↳username9 no because it looks like Y/n and Arthur are having a caption war lol it's funny

username8 It's childish but let a girl heal from a heartbreak in peace

yourusername karma will take it from here

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username1 MISS GIRL?? WHO IS THE MAN??

↳username2 We all know it's Charles (allegedly)

username8 Nah cuz I told yall she's gonna find another boyfriend soon

yoursister Loving to see you happy again ❤️

↳yourusername just needed a little upgrade

username3 I have no proof but I just know it's Charles

username4 Do we think she went for Charles because she genuinely likes him or just to get back at Arthur?

↳username5 Wait until someone starts a "she cheated on Arthur with Charles" gossips

username6 My two favorite red flags

↳username7 The homie hopper and the brother hopper, a match made in heaven

username6 The homie hopper is so real, Y/n recently hung out with his ex Charlotte 💀

username8 What kinda brother gets with his brother's ex?

↳username9 Imagine the next family dinner lmao

username10 Y'all it's not even confirmed that the man is Charles, y'all are crazy

↳username6 The post was liked by all the F1 drivers and their partners that were on the party from Y/n's previous post, it says a lot

↳username2 What @/username6 said and also Y/n is now followed by half of the F1 grid AND the wags

charles_leclerc Not your cup of tea, but my glass of wine

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yourusername KARMA IS MY BOYFRIEND❤️

comments on this post have been turned off

[unclewaynemunson]

“I need to tell you something.”

Shitfuckno. Eddie doesn't even know why he's still surprised. This is how it always goes, after all. He should probably just give up and stop dating altogether – again.

Steve looks at him exactly as ominously as the words I need to tell you something require. Perfect Steve. Funny Steve. Sweet Steve. Sexy Steve. Steve, who Eddie had genuinely believed to be different.

Eddie sighs, barely suppressing a dark chuckle while he turns away from that perfect face. He doesn't want to look at Steve when he'll tell him the undoubtedly messed-up shit he's about to spill.

“Lemme guess, you're married?” That was what the last guy he dated told him, seven months after they got to know each other. It can't be much worse than that, can it?

Steve grabs Eddie's hand, causing him to involuntarily jerk up his head and meet his eyes.

“How did you know?”

Jesus H. Christ. Not again.

Eddie roughly pulls his hand out of Steve's grip and laughs a joyless laugh.

“Apparently I'm a good guesser.”

He stands up from the park bench the two of them had been sharing. “Well, Steve, this has been a blast. You should go back to your wife, or husband – don't tell me, I don't even wanna know – and I should um, get going. Maybe tell the next person right away what they'll be getting themselves into. Would save them a lot of wasted time, just in case cheating and going around other people's backs isn't really their thing, y'know.”

“Eddie, wait, let me explain!”

Eddie picks up his pace, but Steve, stubborn as he is, easily keeps up with him.

“I'm really not interested, man.”

“It's not – I'm not cheating on her!”

“Okay, so you have an open marriage, good for you. Still the kind of information you could've shared with me, say, three months ago, don't you think?”

“She's a lesbian.”

And that makes Eddie freeze on the spot. It takes Steve two steps before he realizes Eddie has stopped moving; he walks backwards until he's standing right in front of Eddie.

“She's my best friend,” he says, immediately using Eddie's stunned silence to his advantage. “Robin, my roommate – I told you all about her. We wanted to buy a house together and that turned out to be very complicated when you're not... Well, when you're not romantically involved. So we got married. For the, um, practical reasons. We never – we're like siblings. I love her like a sister. But she's also my wife. Platonically.”

It takes a few seconds until Steve's words sink in. Then, Eddie leaps forward and basically collapses into Steve's arms, needing to hold onto him to prevent himself from crashing to the ground.

Steve's arms are warm, strong, and as safe as ever.

“Eddie, are you okay?” Steve asks softly. His lips brush against Eddie's ear while he speaks, and worry colors his voice.

Perfect Steve. Too-good-to-be-true Steve.

“Jesus Christ, Steve,” is the only thing Eddie manages to say.

“I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you,” Steve says. “It's just – I've gotten some, um... Less than ideal reactions, in the past, whenever I told this when I was seeing someone. So I thought it'd be better to wait until things were getting serious.” He sighs, tangling his fingers in Eddie's hair. “I didn't wanna scare you off. Are we – are you okay?”

Eddie nods. He lifts his head from where it's resting against Steve's shoulder and raises his hands to squeeze them around Steve's face.

“We're okay,” he says. “And I'm sorry I didn't want to listen to you. I–” He stops; he can't find the words right away. It's still difficult to talk about those things; to let himself be vulnerable. But Steve has been honest with him, so it's only fair to return the favor.

“I've been hurt, Steve,” he confesses. “More than once. I've had some really shitty experiences with dudes not being honest with me. I thought that that was what was happening again, and I couldn't – I couldn't go through that again. Especially not with you.”

“Jesus, Eddie, I'm so sorry.”

“It's okay,” Eddie rushes to say, pulling Steve even closer towards him. “I trust you.” And as soon as these words leave his mouth, he knows it's the truth.

“I do want to be absolutely clear about one thing, though,” Steve says.

Eddie leans back in Steve's arms to give him an expectant look.

“Robin is my wife. I'm not planning on that to change anytime soon. We've been through a lot together. She's been the most important person in my life for years. We own a house and a dog together, and I love her more than anything. I like you a lot, and I promise you I'm all-in with you, but... Robin is still my number one. And that's not gonna change overnight. I need you to be okay with that.”

Eddie swallows. He looks into Steve's eyes. All he sees is a man who is honest, who loves his friends deeply, and who refuses to make any compromises when it comes to love – whether it be the platonic or the romantic kind.

It doesn't scare Eddie off; it only makes him fonder of Steve.

He smiles, glances around to check if they're alone, and presses a quick kiss against Steve's lips.

“I think I can live with that,” he says. “As long as I'm the only one who gets to do this.” He closes his eyes and lets his lips meet Steve's again.

The sigh that Steve breathes into their tentative kiss is one filled with relief.

[seat-safety-switch]

Are you now, or have you ever, been a member of the American Horticultural Society? If you answered in the affirmative to this question, there are several detectives down at the station who would like to talk with you about your activities over the last few weeks. Don't worry, I'm no snitch: I just want my shitboxes back.

Gardeners are nothing if not resourceful. If you go into a good-sized suburban backyard garden, you'll see trash cans getting used to protect plants. Old lawnmower-struck hose irrigating tender veggies. And CD-ROMs dangling everywhere, to alternatingly antagonize and beguile the crows into not eating all the cucumbers this year. I admire this kind of waste-not-have-not mentality, but sometimes it goes a little bit too far.

A couple months ago, there were some rumblings about "guerrilla gardeners." These rogue seedsfolx would roam the countryside, eyes peeled for opportunity to plant a garden on land they don't own. Upon finding old abandoned lots, sun-bleached traffic islands, and unattended flower beds, they would strike, stuffing innocent lands with their ovules. Soon, a gorgeous garden of hardy plants would be in that place. Pissed off the bylaw officers, who now had to deal with the beauteous, chaotic bounty of nature, rather than dead, brown grass when it came time to mow. I thought this was pretty funny, until it happened to me.

Do you know why they tell you not to leave your dog inside a car? Because it gets really hot inside a car. Sun goes into the windows, but the heat can't escape. We call this a "greenhouse effect." Do you know what else has a greenhouse effect? Fucking greenhouses do. One morning, I came out to my yard full of several dozen non-operable, shit-box automobiles to find that someone had jimmied the locks on each and every one of them. On the seats? Plants. Some were exotic hothouse varieties. Some were simply pretty flowers. And they were all growing strong, fed by the sunlight through the greasy windows, the controlled drip of rainwater through the rust holes in the roof, the iron-rich powder on the seats, and the humid rainforest atmosphere of my cars' interior. What was this town coming to?

I cleared this out, of course, placing the plants gently outside, where they belonged. Soon, even more exotic varietals of botanist-lust found their way into the cars to replace them. If I turned my back for a weekend, I'd be chopping a strange kind of vine that even Wikipedia says "I dunno" about. The local bylaw officer noticed, too, while trying to do one of her routine sweeps to see if she could get me on a technicality. Seeing the work of the guerrilla gardeners enraged her so much that I don't think she even noticed I started parking the Viscount in the neighbour's swimming pool to keep the interior safe from all but water lilies.

[loveharlow]

Headcannon for JJ 😍

Bsf!JJ taking care of drunk reader after a party and she’s being like super difficult and annoying but he still looks after her and they end up cuddling in bed 🫶

i feel like she act like a whiny child honestly, just pouts and hundreds of "nooo"'s and "get awayyy"'s

underage drinking, swearing

"It's hot in hereeee." You whined, falling limply onto the couch in John B's living room as everyone stumbled inside. Every one of you was some form of intoxicated, states ranging from buzzed to completely wasted.

Needless to say you were on the far end of that spectrum.

"Probably because you have on my hoodie." JJ's voice met your ears, the boy sitting next to your feet as the others scattered.

"I'm gonna be sick..." Kie groaned as she locked herself in the bathroom.

"Please don't throw up on the bathmat, it's new!" A barely tipsy John B called as he kicked the front door shut, carrying a giggly Sarah into his room, sighing as he let the girl fall to the mattress and put the covers over her.

"You're all irresponsible and I'm not playing nurse when you reap the consequences in the morning." Pope said simply, walking into the kitchen and opening the fridge — pulling out a water and walking out onto the patio.

You giggled mindlessly, head rolling side to side. "You're all so funny..." You wheezed.

"Okay, Tequila Princess. Let's get you situated..." JJ advised, attempting to sit you up straight as two of his hands went under your back, but you offered no support, your frame hanging lifeless in his arms. "C'mon, Munchkin." He groaned, using all his strength to prop you up against the couch properly. "There we go."

The blonde lifted your arms, threading them backwards through the arm holes to get the piece of clothing off of you.

"Nooo, what're you doin'?" You moaned, weakly slapping his arms away.

"Thought you said you were hot..." He paused in his movements, cocking an eyebrow at you.

In your drunken state, you managed to reel your neck back at his statement, a look of suspicion on your face before a small smirk emerged. "...You think I'm hot?"

He just giggled, slightly buzzed himself. "You want the hoodie off or not?"

"Yes-"

"Okay then." He told you, moving to pull your other arm out.

"But then I'll be cold!" You reprimanded, snatching your other arm away as the boy sighed.

"Then I'll tuck you in." He said, voice a bit short as he knew you'd be difficult until you started to doze off.

"But what if the covers come off-"

"Then I will cuddle with you, alright?" He said firmly. "I'll hold you so tight you won't be able to move a muscle, okay? Now, give me your arm."

You didn't respond, just pouted drunkenly as you allowed your best friend to take the hoodie off of you, pulling it over your head and knocking strands of hair into your vision as he tossed it to the side and stood up, heading towards the fridge.

You tried to remove the annoying pieces of keratin out of your face and unwind them from your lashes and unstick them from your lips as you heard the clanking of glass in the kitchen before the blonde was returning, a glass of water in his hand.

"Here, drink this." He said, handing you the glass, stopping you as you reached for it with one hand. "Use both hands." Doing as he said, you brought the glass to your lips as he knelt down in front of you, taking off your shoes.

"Eugh!-" You gagged, pulling the glass from your lips as you took your first sip. "What is this?"

"...It's water, princess."

"Ngh...why is it warm?" You cringed, leaning forward to put the glass on the coffee table as JJ removed your other shoe.

"Because if I put ice in it, you'd drink it too fast and get a headache." He said, standing up straight and looming above you and holding both of his hands out. "C'mon, let's get you to bed."

You slapped your hands into his, allowing the blonde to help you up off the couch and lead you into the guest room. "Ooh! Can we sleep on the beach tonight? Like last time?" You asked, pupils wide as JJ laid you down and tucked you in.

"No, we cannot." He said, shaking his head and laughing as a frown immediately replaced your giddy expression.

"Why not?" You asked, tone grumpy as the boy climbed in bed behind you, you shuffling to face him.

"Because, like last time, you'll run out into the water and I'll have to catch you."

"Hmph." You huffed, rolling your eyes. "Whatever..."

You could feel the boy huff out of laughter as his arms wrapped around your back, pulling you closer into him as yours went around his waist.

"...Night, Munchkin."

"...'Night, J."

©loveharlow.

[the-offside-rule]

Daniel Ricciardo (RB Visa) - Lover

Requested: yes

Swift Series

Prompt: Daniel and international popstar Y/n accidentally get married in Vegas

Warnings: nope

Daniel woke up in his hotel room with a pounding headache, groaning as he tried to open his eyes but being blinded by the sun coming through the windows each time. He turned around, cursing to himself before his eyes widened. Y/n, the Y/n lay beside him, in just a bra. While they had met several times before and hung out with similar people, this was the last person he expected to see in his bed the morning after a race weekend. He began questioning what had happened? What had he done? Or more importantly, who had he done? Whilst Daniel sat thinking about what to say to her when she woke up, he ultimately decided to order room service and go to the bathroom to actually think.....and maybe throw up.

Y/n was awoken by a door closing quite loudly. She jumped up, looking around, her eyes had grown wife as she realised that she wasn't asleep in her room, she was in someone else's. She heard footsteps coming and turned to see who it was. "Uh... morning?" Daniel croaked, his voice scratchy from the combination of dehydration and excessive partying. Y/n grabbed the bed covers and pulled them up over her chest. "What the fuck happened?" She mumbled to herself. "Yeah, I said the same thing."

Daniel scratched his head, replying, "I wish I knew. It's all a bit of a blur." Suddenly, his eyes widened as he noticed a shiny object on his finger. "You don't think this would have anything to do with it?" He lifted his hand to show Y/n, before she looked down, spotting the matching ring. "I got married in Vegas." She was so unbelievably angry with herself. Since she was a child she dreamed of this big extravagant wedding and now she just got married in Vegas?

She looked over to Daniel as he burst into laughter. "Well, you can't get rid of me now." Daniel chuckled, his Australian accent making the situation even more absurd. "Daniel, this is not funny, I'm going to get into so much shit!" Y/n said. Daniel turned to open his big bottle of champagne as Y/n continued her rant. "You're having champagne? At this time?" Daniel walked over to the bed with a glass and sat down, handing it to her and pouring her a glass. "Why are we still here? We should go get divorced!" Y/n implored him. "You need to know where you got married first." Daniel replied, drinking the champagne from the bottle as Y/n looked on. She downed the glass quickly before grabbing the bottle from Daniel. "I need more than a glass." She mumbled, amking Daniel laugh. "I don't know why you're so upset, I'd make a great husband."

"Daniel, can we just think about what happened and then we'll get down to the details of whether or not you're a good husband?" Daniel nodded before Y/n began to think. "So chief, what happened last night?" Daniel asked, rubbing his temples in an attempt to alleviate the throbbing ache. Y/n shook her head, her expression mirroring his confusion. "I don't really remember much. We were at that bar, right?" Daniel nodded slowly, bits and pieces of their escapades starting to trickle back into his consciousness. "Yeah, we were celebrating... something." He lifted the champagne tp his lips once more before handing it over to Y/n. She frowned, trying to recall the reason behind their impromptu celebration. "Was it the points you scored? Maybe my new song got number one?"

"Maybe we just got fucking wasted." Daniel shrugged, before Y/n slapped his bare chest, making him wince in pain. "Oh, shit. I'm sorry." Y/n said. "I vaguely recall a dance-off and a questionable karaoke rendition of 'I Will Survive.'" She ran her fingers through her hair. "Oh, great," Daniel chuckled. "Classic Vegas moves." As she continued on with the possibilities, Daniel looked at the crumpled looking paper on the night stand. Daniel unfolded it tentatively, his heart sinking as he read the words scrawled across the page: Marriage Certificate - Daniel Ricciardo & Y/n Y/l/n - Las Vegas, Nevada.

Y/n's hand flew to her forehead as the reality of their situation sunk in. "Oh my God... we actually got married." Daniel let out a chuckle laugh, his mind oscillating between disbelief and amusement. "I know. I would have actually gotten you a nice ring. Maybe an expensive one?" Y/n slapped his chest again. "Yeah, it's still sore when you do that."

"Sorry, but you need to stop joking about this. It's serious!" She said. "It's really not. No one even knows." She looked to him. "We were clubbing with other drivers, surely one of them were there. Daniel went to turn on his phone, but it was dead. "Must have been to occupied to charge my phone." Daniel joked. "Yeah, getting married." Y/n replied, charging her phone. "I was thinking of starting our honeymoon." He gasped. "Are we going to have a baby Ricciardo?"

"No!" Daniel arched a brow. "Excuse me, but you would be lucky to have a child with my genes." He said, pretending to be hurt. "Yeah, and your humour." She rolled her eyes. "See? Dream team." They sat in silence for a few minutes. She expected a call from her manager at any given second. He was going to kill her. Daniel noticed how tense she was getting and turned to Y/n, holding out his hand. "Well, at least we've got one epic story for the grandkids." Y/n chuckled, taking his hand. "Yep, and a marriage certificate to prove it."

"If our managers don't call us in the next hour, they won't know and I say we go get divorced." Y/n thought about it for a moment. "I mean, if they don't know why bother? The point of us divorcing is so they get off our backs. Plus, it's broad daylight. If people see us going to the Chapel, people will find out." Daniel nodded. "So we're staying married?" Y/n smiled. "Of course. You're like the best husband I could have asked for." Daniel squeezed her hand. "Well, I say we head to the airport and get out of here." Daniel suggested, getting up. "Or we could enjoy our honeymoon with some movies?" He chuckled and sat back down, grabbing the remote control and turning Netflix on. "Sounds good. Can I?" Y/n nodded, allowing Daniel to wrap an arm around her as she leaned into him. "You're coming to Abu Dhabi, though." Daniel said. "Duh. You're going to go to the last race without your wife?"

[shuenkio]

That basketball player | Lhs.

Paring: Heeseung X M!reader | Genre: SMUT

Synopsis: Since when did heeseung get that big glow up? Back in the junior year he was just a guy with his bang covering his forehead but now? You can't help but to stare at him every time he is playing basketball, jingling.

Cw: masturbate in the bathroom, bigger cock Heeseung, drunk, public explicit scenes, cursing, no plot Ig, alone time, mentioned of cum, stained etc. [18+] mdni

Non proof read | Eng is not my 1st.

This is a work of fanfiction, do not throw unnecessary tantrums on this nsfw/sfw blog. ©Shuenkio

A#N: Yo what! I feel pity to leave y'all alone with my no update so here a smut hardcore, before I vanish once again. (Yes this is me, a bit freaky than usual ಥ⁠‿⁠ಥ

Being friends with a sports guy like Heeseung is not an easy job, nor is it for your mental, freaky mind. Every time you were there, watching him practice for the competition. You can't find but to stare at a little distracted place, like a weirdo. However, it's not one fault side; since Heeseung does have his own package ever since then, it'd be a jingle bell at every instance.

Not to mention, back in the junior year, Heeseung is just a guy who just hit puberty, freshly adult, bang cover all his forehead like a nerd. In the meantime, all that matters transformed into this: a hot guy with a huge beard that could squeeze a lemon, a slender yet masculine frame from head to toes, and the most glow-up part was probably his middle part.

Which you can't help but to wonder while nosebleed; imagine how'd it look like to be sight. And so on, wondering turns into reality when it's happening during the party of one of your classmates. Walking in the bathroom, as you thought nobody was there with no light on, until when the lights flickered, you were stunned, your hearts just doing a back flip once you saw the tipsy Heeseung who's jerking off on the toilet.

Omfg, is this for real? Think to yourself. Can't hide the red blush that was painted on your face, you immediately apologize and leave; however, before you could, a large hand appeared and pinged you against the door, allowing you to escape this awkward situation.

"Hmm... M/n? What a surprise to see you here during my alone time," said the half-drunk guy, looking down to see his cock peeking through his zipper, naked. In front of you, but did he care? No. You swallow down, feel like a stone stuck in your breath—this is just a dream wake-up.

Your reaction was funny enough to make Heeseung chuckle out; you seem to be nervous, shy, and lately a bit of a turn-on.

"We're alone, aren't we? Now don't hide your true colors, bud; I know you've always wanted this, isn't that right?" Heeseung claim, pointed out right through you. No way he caught you in act, but where? Yet there's no use right now to wonder about it; a big gigantic cock is staring at you right now; he was so hard his cum is leaking out, desperate for some way out of those balls.

Out of surprise, you snapped as Heeseung let out a moan, in contact with his skin too close to yours. Cover your face with your palm to evade your crazy mess face; his pre-cum began to stain on your pants!

"Fuck m/n, take a hold of it. Before I change my mind, I'm not sober," panicking Sprint free in your vein as you shudder to his words, Should you or shouldn't? This once-in-a-lifetime opportunity is so rare, you wouldn't want to go to waste.

Seeing you froze in the spot, back pressed against the door too much, Heeseung snatched one of your hands and wrapped them around his shaft. Lord, have mercy.

"Ahh, so good, m/n, euuu, that's right," biting his lip, his back arching forward, thrusting inside of your palm in rhythm. Both of his hands are pinning you in between, while he endures in pleasure. No word to say; you seem to enjoy what you're doing. His foreskin moved up and down, his tip peeking in every stroke.

Heeseung's freaky side was not what you expected; he was far more wild. Your surroundings are no longer your priority; you didn't care if anyone might hear. Continue to please the man of your dreams; no, this is a dream to be able to touch him, your friend.

A few more strokes, his hip bucking more and more needy, his balls later slipped out of his underwear, come out before slapping against the friction of his own pant. As a result, the fire in him turned on even better. Both of you can't think straight, locked in this bathroom, just the two, enjoying times together.

"Cum... I need to cum m/n!! I'm going to piss Ahh Ahh FUCK." He's knees weaken. The hands that are pinning you in find their way to belt around your waist, despairing for support, before a load of hot cum splashes out on both clothes. Heeseung is indeed sensitive; that might as well be one of his weaknesses for your dictionary.

He then falls down on the floor on his knees finally, as he leans against the wall nearby in this tight space. Draining out and overwhelmed by the masturbation. Little did you know, there's also a stain in your pants too, not only from Heeseung's cum stained. Ugh, he got you in anyway possible.

"Shit..." A couple of minutes passed, his brows furrowing while his eyes shut, before he pissed out for real.

"I—damn it." 

[churipu]

THE MOMENT THEY REALIZE THEY'RE IN LOVE ִ ࣪𖤐

featuring. gojo satoru, sukuna ryomen, itadori yuuji, toji fushiguro x reader

warnings. cursing, college! au, toji being a single father during his second term of uni (i searched that most japanese college uses 2 terms or trimester system / 3 terms, 1 term of uni in japan is around 15 weeks apparently) -> please tell me if i get this wrong.

note. omg, for the anons who have sent in requests to me, i apologize if these came out before your requests did, i'm trying to empty out my drafts :( but pls note that i am not ignoring your requests at all, it will be written, i promise <;33

GOJO SATORU

when he finds himself checking his phone countless of times, waiting for your message

i promise you, you both started out as work partners in one of your lectures. the two of you were complete strangers to each other — he doesn't know you, and you don't know him. but, either way, the two of you had to get to know each other because this was a crucial grade to pass this lecture.

gojo never thought about having feelings towards you, his work partner. he thought to himself, he'd just get this work done, pass this lecture, and never see you again.

but fate is a funny thing.

the way you made him feel like he wasn't just special because of his face, but his heart too. whereas most people in campus would consider him the pretty boy who could go head-to-head with the hottest celebrities — they just think of him as a pretty boy. and gojo would just go along with them, he gets used to it.

but you? you didn't consider him special at all. although, you did make him feel special the way other people can't.

gojo deep down, knows he was fucked up the moment he finds himself checking his phone to see if you'd reply to his messages, and when you do, he gets so happy. gojo was never a fast responder to everyone — because he practically receives the same kind of messages, "gojo hang out with us", "gojo go out with me", "gojo i like you".

but with you? he won't waste a second at all. even if sometimes you didn't reply as fast as he does, because you are a busy person in campus. you'll work on that after you both started dating, i promise.

SUKUNA RYOMEN

when you stood up for him when nobody would.

sukuna, how do i say this? not everyone is fond of him, people are scared of him — they talk shit behind his back, and don't dare to approach him. people dreaded when they have to be in the same group with him, despite the fact that he actually works; they still think he's a bad person.

"you guys are talking shit to a person who's in our group, if you want to say something to him, have the balls to say it to his face. and while he's here, why don't you tell him about it?" you tell the two people who were sitting beside you, who had been talking in whispers about how they were unlucky to be grouped up with sukuna.

and sukuna? he could honestly care less, he'd gotten used to those kind of things anyway. but when you actually stood up for him, he could only look at you with an amused smile.

he's definitely curious about you after that day — he has pride. and he'd never admit that he's actually pretty thankful that you, the first person to stand up for him, actually did what you did. because now people are a little terrified of being told off by you.

sukuna finally sucks it up at the end of the semester and tries to talk to you. yes, it took him the whole semester to talk to you, asking you for your number, and then thanking you for what you did because nobody has ever done that before to him.

ITADORI YUUJI

when you went all out to tutor him so he'd pass his lectures, teaching him patiently when he doesn't understand something.

yuuji hates studying. and when his lecturer asked you to tutor him, he feels extremely bad for you — he feels that he'd just going to waste your time tutoring him, when he knows that he's going to fail this one subject.

but when you reassured him, and encouraged him. saying that you will do anything to teach him so that he could pass, he gets a little emotional at the thought. you both were just mere classmates, and he barely knows you, vice versa.

when he doesn't understand a topic, he gets so frustrated at himself for not being able to understand it. but you, you were very patient with the male, reassuring him that you had the time to teach him over so that he will be able to understand the said topic.

and when he does finally understand, he gets so happy. he started looking forwards to your tutoring sessions, and like everyone said: if you enjoy something, it passes by quickly. and it's true, yuuji feels like time went by in a flash, and the exams soon started.

he passed with flying colors, he makes sure that you know about his grades — and points out that without you, he wouldn't be able to pass. yuuji, gets a little upset when he realizes that if the exams are over, you had no more tutoring sessions with him; which meant no more conversations.

so he has to ask you out right then, he didn't want to just return as mere classmates. he wanted to be more than that.

TOJI FUSHIGURO

when you didn't care about his shitty reputation of being a single father while still being on the second term of uni.

being a single parent is hard enough. not to mention, in university. not married, with a baby itself gets a lot of unwanted (negative) attention — toji, who once failed to get a babysitter on a weekday, and so he had to bring his eight month old son to class.

his son—megumi— was a calm baby, thankfully. the young one didn't cry or babble during lectures, and he just slept through it. toji was a little relieved to say the least, but ever since people find out about him being a single father to an eight month old baby, a lot of assumptions and words have gone around.

toji hated group works, especially when he has to pick the group himself. people didn't want a single father to be in their group, they assumed that the male would focus on his baby and ends up deserting the group work.

so when that particular day where he has to bring megumi to campus, strapped on a baby carrier on his chest. his lecturer just had to give out a partner work, and to add the cherry on top; the lecturer left the class to choose their own partner. so the male sat on his place, a pencil in between his nose and upper lip as he puckered them lightly — hearing his classmates choosing each other.

he figured that he could just do this and get the grade himself, solo. but when you came up and slipped into the seat next to him, he was of course surprised.

you asked him if he would like to partner up with you for this work, and after a few seconds, he accepted your offer.

toji knew it was getting bad when you didn't care about what people say about you getting close to him. just by choosing him for this work made your reputation falter a bit, and he was honestly ready for you to back out of the partner work.

but you didn't, and he knew it's bad for him, his feelings, and his heart.

the way you treated him and megumi like they're both normal (which they are normal humans), and the way you always make him feel included makes his heart race. sometimes, when he fails to look for a babysitter when you both are working for this project, you tell him he didn't have to since megumi is a calm baby.

he finds himself in awe when baby megumi plays with you during both of your little meet ups outside of class to do the project. he's in love.

© CHURIPU 2024 , DO NOT COPY OR REPOST ANYWHERE

[cutielando]

wedding of the century | g.r.

social media au

synopsis: in which you and George finally tie the knot

my masterlist

liked by georgerussell63, alexandrasaintmleux and 1,267,348 others

yourusername last vacation as an engaged couple💍🤍 tagged: georgerussell63

📍Bali, Indonesia

view all 89,352 comments

georgerussell63 can't wait to make you my wife🤍

yourusername can't wait to be your wife😭😮‍💨

landonorris there are children on this app, you know

yourusername we know, so what are you doing out of bed?

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user1 our favorite engaged couple serving once again🤍🤍🤍🤍

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alex_albon some photo credits would have been nice

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alex_albon …lando’s right, you’re no fun

georgerussell63 don’t make fun of my soon-to-be wife, alexander

mercededamgf1 Wishing you a nice vacation and we’ll see you at the wedding!🤍

yourusername thank you admin!!❤️

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lilymhe you’re glowing, y/n🤍🤍

yourusername wedding bliss is settling in already 🤍

charles_leclerc why didn’t you invite us?

yourusername …it was a couple’s getaway?

charles_leclerc i don’t see your point

georgerussell63 we wanted to be alone, mate

charles_leclerc oh…nasty asses

user5 my parents right there ❤️

liked by formula1wags, mercedesamgf1 and 39,147 others

formula1gossip George Russell and Y/N Y/L/N are getting married tomorrow! We wish the couple nothing but the very best. What do we think about the grand event?

view all 824 comments

user1 MY PARENTS ARE GETTING MARRIED🫶🏻🫶🏻

user2 i just know the other drivers will get wasted

maxlover max is gonna get so drunk lol

georgieboi I cannot wait!!!!🤍🤍

user3 seeing them get engaged and now married is like watching a fairytale for real

user4 so happy for them!!!!

mercedesamgf1 it's going to be a wild night, that's for sure😅

user5 we're gonna need photos admin!!!!!

mercedesamgf1 of course!!

user6 i just know their wedding is going to be so good!!🤍🤍 Y/N is going to be gorgeous, i just know it

liked by f1, francisca.cgomes and 9,174,582 others

yourusername & georgerussell63 Mr. and Mrs.🤍

view all 291,573 comments

f1 Congratulations to the happy couple!❤️

mercedesamgf1 the most beautiful wedding and the most beautiful couple!!!! (we're totally not saying that because they're ours)🤍🤍

maxverstappen1 congrats mate, beautiful wedding

yourusername you were drunk for the better part of it

georgerussell63 and shirtless

maxverstappen1 still a good wedding

francisca.cgomes congrats guys!!!! Y/N, you were INSANELY BEAUTIFUL BABE 🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍

yourusername thank you so much babe!!!!!!! i love you girlie 🫶🏻🫶🏻

francisca.cgomes i love you too 🤍🤍

georgerussell63 I was there, too, yk

francisca.cgomes stop trying to steal the spotlight, George

landonorris good job, guys👍🏻

yourusername thank you, lando

georgerussell63 do you even remember being there?

landonorris bits and pieces

yourusername no wonder, you drank half of the bar😒

landonorris i had fun, okay?

yourusername i’m sure you did 😂 i’m glad you had fun, you lifted the spirits

user1 OUR PARENTS ARE FINALLY MARRIED😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

user2 omg they look so good!!!!!🤍🤍

user3 if you look closely, you can see me under the car

user4 AHHHHHHHHH THE RUSSELLS🥹🥹🥹

user5 your honor, I AM IN LOVE WITH THEM

user6 George is so lucky, Y/N was stunning 🤍😭😭

georgerussell63 i know, right?

user6 George is just as much of a simp for Y/N as we are 😭😭

carlossainz55 wishing happiness to the happy couple!🌶️❤️

yourusername thank you, chilli🫶🏻❤️

georgerussell63 thanks, mate🤍

oscarpiastri very interesting event, it was

georgerussell63 we are sorry for the trauma you have suffered, Oscar

yourusername we are willing to pay for your therapy

oscarpiastri thank you

user7 i wanna know what happened to Oscar 😭😭

oscarpiastri it is never going to surface

user8 what happened at that wedding 😭?????

danielricciardo 🤍🤍 very beautiful night

yourusername thank you daniel 🤍 we couldn’t have kept everything under control without you

georgerussell63 glad you stepped up, mate

danielricciardo anytime for my favorite people

lewishamilton glad to have been by your side on the most important day of your lives!🤍

georgerussell63 thank you lewis!

yourusername roscoe was the most important guest 🤍🤍 if we’re being honest

lewishamilton ...overshadowed by my own dog

lilymhe the most fun i’ve had in a long time ❤️❤️

yourusername i’m so glad you had fun 🫶🏻🫶🏻 thank you for being there for us

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yourusername stoooop😭😭😭🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻

charles_leclerc she’s been insinuating stuff ever since, what have you done?

georgerussell63 she has that effect

yourusername you’re sleeping outside.

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yourusername thank you, ily🫶🏻🤍🤍

oscarpiastri stop stealing my girlfriend, you’re married

yourusername and?

georgerussell63 what do you mean and????? i’m right here

yourusername details

liked by landonorris, mercedesamgf1 and 2,193,045 others

yourusername life is a constant honeymoon with you 🤍

📍 Amalfi Coast, Italy

view all 98,173 comments

georgerussell63 every day with you feels like a honeymoon🤍

yourusername i love you so much 😭🤍

georgerussell63 i love you more 🤍

francisca.cgomes I want pictures!!!!!!

yourusername of course babe!!! could never forget you

georgerussell63 she's been taking pictures ever since we arrived for you

francisca.cgomes priorities, george☺️

mercedesamgf1 We wish you two an incredible honeymoon! 🤍

yourusername thank you admin 🤍🤍 (if you dare call him while we're away, i'll hunt you down)

mercedesamgf1 yes ma'am

landonorris come home, the kids miss you

yourusername we just left, aren't you having fun with your brother alex?

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georgerussell63 figure it out, guys

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user3 georgerussell63 can you fight?

georgerussell63 for her, yes.

yourusername damn babe, that's hot

georgerussell63 you’re hot 😋

alexandrasaintmleux 🫶🏻🫶🏻

yourusername 🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻miss u girl

charles_leclerc stop making her cry

yourusername stop making a fuss over everything i say

user3 they’re sooooooo beautiful together 😭😭

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user5 all that’s left now is a mini russell running around🤍🤍🤍

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user7 guys let’s not overdo it, they literally just got married 😭🥲

user8 how long are you guys staying?

yourusername two weeks!! 🤍 then i have to return him to mercedesamgf1 😒

mercedesamgf1 sorry 😅

lilymhe can i join? i’ll leave alex at home ☺️

yourusername yes

georgerussell63 no

alex_albon what did i do wrong?????

lilymhe nothing, dear. just circumstances

lewishamilton hope you two have a great time! keep him away from his phone 😂

yourusername he has very limited time allowed on his phone and what he can do on it 😁

georgerussell63 this is that time

yourusername use it well, babe. the clock is ticking

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